Here it is, the top movies that have reeeaaally ruined things for me. Wether my expectations were high, or incredibly low, these movies just put the last nail in the coffin for their franchises, actors, or directors. Just think of going to a restaurant that you always eat at, and deciding to try something new and different, only to find out that what you ordered is completely disgusting/boring/ and just downright a bad decision. So here's the Top 5, in my book, be careful though, all the articles contain spoilers so if you havent seen the movie, too bad. Please feel free to comment with anything you agree with, or disagree. This site is open to comments/suggestions!
5. Pineapple Express.
Seth Rogen, escaping with his career.
Remember UNDELCARED? No? Ok what about 40-Year-Old Virgin? Closer? Ok, Superbad? Remember? Ok, thats when Seth Rogen was funny. Correction, thats when Seth Rogen was FRESH. Seth Rogen got stale quicker than Will Ferrell, and Will Ferrell was pumping out movies ALL the time. What made this movie so disappointing was that Rogen tried the same shtick that he always does, only he didnt have the right context, or supporting actors to pull it off. The one shining beacon of light in this movie was DANNY MCBRIDE, who stars in the BRILLIANT 'Eastbound and Down' on HBO (which will be discussed later...), who offers a fresh personality to the whole thing.
4. Zach And Miri Make A Porno
They don't seem very interested. Like everybody else in the theater.
Please just read my review titled 'Disappointing', and skip the movie.
3. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
"Wait in the ending we're supposed to find WHAT? Seriously?"
What if Luke Skywalker, while trying to take down the Galactic Republic, inadvertenly discovered a powerful ancient relic from the past and didnt care all that much. Sound absurd? Well flip that around that thats what happened in Indiana Jones 4. Initial I liked the movie, but after a few days, it began to grow sour in my mind. I had a rather long conversation with Gavin about this and we decided that we initial liked this movie because it was an Indiana Jones Movie--we were gonna like it if Indy made furniture for 2 hours on screen. But soon after, you realize you were duped. Why oh why did Indy and his friends have to find aliens? ALIENS. But Indiana Jones discovering aliens wasnt the worst part, oh no. The WORST part is that, immediately after the enormous alien saucer emerges from the earth, right below their feet, and flies away into space NOBODY CARES. They all look it, smiling, as if to say "Those wacky aliens, whatareyougonnado?", and there is no verbal mention of this outrageous event by any of the characters from that point on. What if they come back, Indy? WHAT IF THEY COME BACK? Well we're all going to be killed because you and your pals didnt tell anybody about them. Ever.
2. X-Men: The Last Stand
Remember in XMEN when Magneto used his magnetic powers
to levitate and restrain Wolverine's adamantium plated
skeleton when he tried to attack him? Neither did whoever
made this professional poster.
This movie has beef. Beef within the studios, between actors and directors, and it showed. Bryan Singer directed the first two X-MOVIES for FOX and when time came to make X3, Singer turned down the offer to make it because he was offered to make SUPERMAN RETURNS (which isnt in this Top 5 for a good reason) for WB, but offered to still direct the movie when he finished SUPERMAN. Well FOX got pissed and said No, Thanks and got another director to do it. Well Singer took his writers with him and also Cyclops (James Marsden), to help him with SUPERMAN. So pissy FOX hired new writers so they wouldnt have to use the script that Singer's writers had already made for X3 and killed Cyclops in the first 10 minutes of the movie. Lame. Not only that, but FOX effectively made it so that there more than likely will not be any direct sequels in this XMEN series, and left a very ugly scar on the franchise. EVERYBODY was killed, there was no GAMBIT, ANGEL sucked, the costumes were ridiculous, and nobody did anything except for WOLVERINE. Its like if you worked very hard to make a very awesome ice cream sundae, and just as you were about to finish it, somebody else came in and rubbed a pickle in it, the smashed it with the palm of their hand. And your sundae was forgotten.
1. Spider-Man 3
Two visions, one movie, one resolution: RUIN EVERYTHING.
Spider-Man shattered, SHATTERED, records a long time ago, and along with X-MEN 2 brought us the movies we have today. BATMAN BEGINS, THE DARK KNIGHT, WATCHMEN, SUPERMAN RETURNS, THE PUNISHER, THE INCREDIBLE HULK, IRON MAN, 300, THE SPIRIT, and SIN CITY all would NOT have happened had Spider-Man and X2 not achieved the success it did. They had the right talent in its writers, directors, actors and vision and brought us the comic book movies we now have today, and BOOMED the comic book movie craze. Hell, I remember waiting in line for 30 minutes to watch SPIDERMAN, and the entire theater in Chandler was filled with people standing and sitting in lines waiting for their first chance to see SPIDERMAN. I also remember going to the theater 8 times to watch the first X-Men movie with my brothers and Julian, its still the most times ive seen a movie in the theaters. I saw X2 5 times in theaters. So when SM3 came out in 2007, about 5 years deep into the comic book movie onslaught, it should have been monumental. It should have been grand. It should have been the best comic book movie of all time. It wasn't. When SM3 was announced, fans wanted VENOM in the movie, and they deserved it. But director Sam Raimi publicly expressed that he was NOT a fan of Venom, that he was a great character but he personally didnt 'understand' him, and that Venom would 'never' be in a Spiderman movie as long as he's involved. BUT, many odd clues showed up online and before you knew it Topher Grace was cast as 'Edward Brock Jr.', aka Eddie Brock, aka VENOM. At first the director Sam Raimi claimed he was proud of his product and if anybody didnt like it, they didnt understand it. But recently he's changed his story. He claims that he was forced by the studio to put Venom in the movie, and that his creative control was stripped from him during filming. Basically, he couldnt make the movie he wanted. And it shows in the movie. You could almost cut the movie in half and have two different films. With two villains (three if you count non-Venom Eddie Brock), SPIDERMAN getting and losing the famous black suit, Mary Jane bitching all the time, TWO love triangles, and a mysterious dance number, its as if the studio and the director were playing tug of war as the movie was playing right in front of us, and the director gave in but as payback added in absurd resolutions and dance numbers. But all is well, word has it that SM4 is on the way with Raimi in full control. And no Venom.
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